Boredom

Sigh... I know there are lots of things I could do but I just can't figure out which one to start. Hence, I'm just here, lying on my bed, wasting my time. I woke up past 11am, having no plans for the day and the rest of the week since Ryan and I agreed that we're going to see each other only after four days straight. We were together yesterday and we've planned to see each other on Saturday. Also, we are going for another swim this Sunday. This time, it's going to be with my relatives from the side of my father.

Also, I am now on my 4th day of dieting. It gets harder and harder each day. Ryan and I ate some great food yesterday and I especially adored the oreo cheesecake! Yummy! After that meal, I didn't eat for the rest of the day. Today I ate 2 bites of skyflakes, 3 small pcs of chocolates, and some soup. I guess that's enough to get me through the night. :) Tomorrow will even be a greater challenge. Sigh.

I didn't get anything done today. All I did was to use the computer the entire day. I need to get a life. I need to start soon but I don't know how. Maybe I'm just scared of failing again after all those times I've tried.

Back from Bangkok, Thailand

Hey. I know this has been long overdue but now is the only time I got the chance to write. So here goes. Before I left last Friday, Ryan sent me a short story and it was great. I fell in love with him all over again. It's true what Lindsey Strauss said that she loved the mind from which Lucas' book sprang from. Because that's exactly how I felt for Ryan's writings.

Anyway, back to the trip to Thailand, we waited at the airport for more or less two hours then we left. I was so hungry on the plane, good thing they had food. The last time I went to Bangkok, there was no food on the plane. Because it was Cebu Pacific. Hahaha. :) Now it's PAL. I loved the food, can you believe that? I guess it's because I was so hungry, I could appreciate anything. Hahaha. :)

We got to Thailand and stuff at the airport went smoothly. We immediately met our tour guide, Lan, and he sent us to our specific hotels while he waited for the others who lost their baggage. Good thing we didn't lose ours. :) I was more than pleased with the hotel because the last time I was in Bangkok, I was more than disappointed. The hotel we booked sucked big time and the bed - oh! I don't even want to think about it. Haha. :)

We shopped a lot and went to see some of the golden buddha's. We also went to the leather factory which I wasn't able to visit the first time I was there. Apparently, I was doomed to return to the Gems Gallery because it's mandatory for all tourists to go there. This time, there were no irritating salespeople because they were all busy catering to the overflowing number of tourists since it's peak season. :)

We shopped a lot more. Sigh. I love shopping. It makes me feel like I have so much to spend with so little time and only so much energy to make use of to carry all the stuff we bought. Going back to the hotel means resting time/shower time/sleeping time. Then off again to shop!!!

I loved being there for shopping and a little bit of touring but I was sad because I missed him so much. That's when I realized that I never want to be that far away from him again. Someday, I want to go back there with him so we can shop together and maybe he can carry all my stuff!!! Hahaha!!! :)

Our last day arrived and as soon as I woke up, I took a bath and headed down to the buffet. Afterwhich, I rested again then went straight to the airport for our 1:50pm Bangkok time flight only to find out that it has been delayed and delayed again, and again. We left Bangkok at almost 6pm already. We wasted our entire day at the airport instead of shopping for even more cheap stuff!!!

I'm glad my time there wasn't that wasted because we met some cool girls from the Phils. as well and we instantly became friends despite our age gap. :) Their names are Mardee and Malou. :) We talked a lot and I guess it has been the start of a great friendship since we decided to keep in touch by exchanging phone numbers and e-mail addresses. :)

We arrived home past 10pm, exhausted but excited to show Lolo and Mama and Adjie the stuff we bought for them. Slept really late but excited to see Ryan the following day for our 4th Monthsary. :)

I missed him so much. I heard my mom and dad are planning to go back but I guess I won't be coming along because I don't want to be far away from Ryan again. Aww. I just love him a lot and I hope his love for me would never change - no matter what. :)

Post Bday Sentiments

Hi. It's May 14 today and yesterday was my 21st bday. I woke up past 9am, if I remember it correctly. My family and I ate out. We certainly ate a lot. :) A great number of people remembered my bday and greeted me through calls and texts. It was such an amazing feeling knowing that a lot of people still care about another person's bday. Hahaha. :)

Anyway, last May 12, I got a new fone. It's a Samsung U700. But it meant giving up my dear Nokia 6300. We had to trade it in. It made me feel really sad because we've been through a lot together. I remember giving it to my brother only to take it back after a few weeks because I couldn't live without it. It's such a nice fone. I loved it, still do. I wish it would be sold to a person who would care for it as much as I do or even more. Aww. :(

I love my new fone. It's so stylish and elegant-looking. However, in terms of ease of use, I'd prefer my old fone. The 2.0MP camera of my Nokia 6300 is also great even if I were to compare it with my Samsung's 3.2 MP camera. Plus my Nokia had an FM radio unlike my Samsung. Aww. Sad. Okay, enough about fones. I'm just really trying to air out my sentiments regarding my fones.

Okay, back to my bday. Ryan came to my house. It was nice having him around although we got into a dramatic scene before he went home. We talked about it through midnight. It had been some serious talk. I was telling him that we keep talking but there's no substance. He thought that I was becoming bored of him but that isn't true. I love being with him. I just thought that maybe we should start to spice things up.

I don't know. I couldn't even figure out exactly what I want to happen. I just wanted to reassure him that my feelings haven't changed. I love him still. And last night, he told me so many things about how he felt and it really opened up my eyes to the reality that I have been blessed with a really great guy and I should be grateful for having him in my life.

Being 21 means that I should start acting maturely. I should stop being selfish and try to look into the future as what Ryan would always tell me. I used to say that we must live one day at a time but now I guess I have to prepare for the many days after today. I just have to because I know my future would be even more beautiful if it is planned with Ryan. Aww.

From fones to bday to love and future. That's what blogging is all about. Hahaha. :) I'm leaving on Friday. Will blog about it once I get back. See ya!

Back from Laguna

Hey. As promised, I'm going to let you know what happened during our long-awaited Laguna trip. We were scheduled to meet yesterday afternoon so all four cars could leave at the same time. But not everyone arrived on time. I was irritable due to the hot weather and I feel guilty for acting so childish. Ryan was telling me that he was just so excited to be with me, still I was being like that. I so want to be with him too but the weather was just too annoying.

Anyway, we left the meeting place past 5pm already when our supposed check-in time was at 6pm, leaving us less than an hour to get to the resort. Nearing the vicinity, it started raining real hard. It was becoming hard for any driver to see the road through the windshield. I'm just so thankful I didn't bring my own car because I would have suffered so much with the traffic and the raining. It felt great to be just a simple passenger at the backseat with my guy. :)

We stopped over to get some stuff and Ryan bought yummy pastillas. :) Again, yummy!!! I think it was already past 7pm when we got to the resort and the first thing that I had in mind was to jump right into the water. I was really yearning for a swim! And this is exactly what I did. After a few minutes in the water, I went to the bathroom only to find out that I have my period. What a disaster. Such a wrong-timing! This meant I could no longer swim otherwise it will become much like the red sea, if you know what I mean. Hehe. :)

I immediately freshened up, got ready for the expected long night ahead. We slept late that's why we got up late as well. I woke up this morning and decided to swim. I didn't care if I had my period. Heck, I came here to swim. Hahaha. :) We played some pool volley. It was fun. Also, I felt so safe each time I get to deeper areas because I know Ryan is there to save me just in case. :) I feel safe in his arms. Aww. :)

After some more minutes, I got out of the pool and decided to take a real bath. Afterwhich, we slept again. Got out of bed just when we were about to leave. I arrived home at around 7pm. The trip assessment? The place was nice, the people have been nice to me as well. They're just so open about a lot of things which somehow surprised me in some ways. I even told Ryan about this. But all is good. :) Thank God they dropped me home. :)

As soon as I got to my room, I began crying. I am already missing him. What the? We were just hand in hand a few minutes ago? How in love could I be? Aww. Anyway, I'm going to see him tomorrow. Yey! Can't wait to be with him again. Aww... Alright then, I'll see you soon. :)

Thank God It's Friday! :)

At long last, it's Friday already... meaning Saturday is just another night's sleep away. I am so excited for tomorrow. You know why? We are going out of town. Well, not so far out of town. We are headed to Laguna tomorrow with Ryan and his cousins. I get so giddy thinking about it. I haven't gone on an outing for quite a while that's why I'm so hyped up. :) I know it will be fun because Ryan is going to be with me. Anyway, as usual, I woke up past 11am and I immediately took a bath. :) Afterwhich, I opened the ref and took out stuff that I'd be needing for my recipe of the day. :) I was determined to cook. :)

Cooking after bathing was quite ironic because just when I've gotten myself cleaned up, there I was making a mess of myself. Hahaha. :) But it was worth the perspiring because my family liked the dish. :) Or at least they pretended to like it. Haha. Anyway, after lunch, I went back to my room to find something productive to do. Somehow, I decided to turn the tv on while I find something worthwhile. I came across HBO and the movie Last Holiday was just about to begin. I watched it and it was really nice. I decided to download a copy of it so I could show the movie to my family as well. :) I also downloaded Day Watch and Night Watch because Ryan asked me to.

Lolo and I played some Bingo again and neither of us won or lost - which was still great because we had so much fun while playing. This afternoon, I came across a blog of a collegue and her blog was very funny. I can sense that she is a really great girl with a really great attitude. :) She obvioulsy speaks what's on her mind and I love it. I wish I could do just the same. :) I guess it has something to do with her blogging frequency. She has a lot of posts and they are all outrageous. :) I wish someone would feel the same about my blog someday. :)

Anyway, I was thinking maybe I should prepare some food that we could bring for tomorrow's outing but Ryan told me he and his cousins have already gone to the grocery to get our food. So maybe, I wouldn't have to cook anything after all. I don't know. But guess what, I am having so much fun while cooking. :) I can't believe it. And what's even greater is that Last Holiday showcased a theme related to cooking which I think is just a coincidence since I am now beginning to like it. :) Or maybe it is a sign that I should start getting serious about it. Hmmm. What do you think?

My lola was asking me if I am currently looking for a new job which is near our home. I said that I wasn't looking yet and that maybe I was planning to start a business - which I still know nothing about. I don't want to look for another job because of fear that I might make another mistake of choosing a job which would also depress me after a few months or so. I want something substantial, something of my own. I don't think that I will ever find happiness in being an employee of someone else. I want to start something on my own. I know it would involve risks but doesn't everyone need to take any risks every once in a while? I love taking risks. :) It's just so exciting.

Anyway, back to tomorrow's event, I just hope I'd be able to get along with his cousins. :) Because when Ryan met my relatives, he did really great. He was loved most by the kids because he was trying to teach them all how to solve the rubix cube. He even gave his to my little cousin, Nicole. Nicole is such a sweet girl. When you ask her to pose for a picture, you will never have to repeat yourself because she would pose for you in an instant. :) Great kid. :)

Most of all, I am excited to get myself in the water. Hahaha. :) Next week, I'm going back to Thailand. :) I am also excited about it. But that means I won't get to see Ryan for four days straight. Aww. :( Anyway, I gotta run. I have to find something else to do. I'll make a post as soon as I get back so that I can narrate everything that transpired in Laguna. :) I'll see you soon. :)

It's my B-day today! BUM day!!! :)

Today, I woke up past 11am. Went straight downstairs to grab something to eat. I immediately thought about my cream puffs! My brother mentioned he ate three pieces last night. I'm glad he didn't eat them all. :) I ate some yummy spaghetti too. After eating, we played Bingo. Yes. Bingo! And I won some coins. Yey! I surfed the internet for some time and I came across a recipe site and I printed out some of those that looked easy to prepare. After that, I decided to cook. Hahaha. Yes, I did. And it was fun. But most of all, the outcome? Mommy and Mama said it tasted great. :) I felt proud. At least I did something productive even though it's a bum day. Hahaha. :)

Ryan woke up before 4pm and he texted me. We talked and he said he was going to take a bath and prepare to go to work. That's when I was getting busy with my cooking stint. Later this afternoon, my mom complained about my expenses using her credit card. I felt awful knowing that I didn't have enough money to repay her especially now that I am jobless - which is out of my own decision to quit my job.

It just wasn't that satisfying for me. And most of all, I was very unhappy with the environment. On top of that, the workload is just too much for me. I don't know. I could name a lot of reasons why I must quit, and I couldn't find any reason why I should stay. So I guess there's nothing to regret. I love my life now. I am free to do what I want with my very precious time. I could sleep late and consequently wake up late as well. I so luvet. :)

While surfing the net - trying to look for the resort where we'd be going this weekend, I came across a site designed to market great houses per location. There's this one house and it costs, well, only, ahem, P38.7M. That's a lot! I was like, I really want to buy the house for myself. But what the, where am I going to get that huge amount of money? I texted Ryan about it and he said, when we hit the Lotto jackpot, he's going to buy it. But what are the chances of winning when he's not even buying any tickets? Haha. :) My lolo and lola keep buying Lotto tickets and today, theirs didn't win any substantial amount. But heck, we could try again next time. :)

I so want the house. It's so pretty. I used to tell myself that I don't need a big house. All I want is some decent place where I could stay. But when I saw the house, it was really jaw-dropping. The house was empty but it still looked great even without any furniture. Plus, it has a pool and a garage for seven cars. Wow. Parking my car there would be easy even if I'm wearing a blindfold. Hahaha. :)

Okay, I don't need that house. I just find it so beautiful. Jason Castro once said, "dreams do come true, so dream BIG!". This line is going to inspire me from this day forward. :) Happy B-day to me. :)