Lazy Thursday Afternoon

What a title? I am always lazy, every afternoon of everyday. What made all the difference? Nothing. Hahaha. :) Today, I was feeling eager to get back to work. But what type of work? I don't know and I am not sure. I am so waiting for Accenture's call. I hope they do because I'd really love to come back. Ryan said they've already met the two new girls added to Blue Flame in replacement of Noda and I, two girls who left the team. :(

It's sad knowing that they've already replaced us but what the heck, it's my fault anyway. I left for selfish and immature reasons. Which are obviously so invalid. I loved the team so much and I miss them everyday. I wish I never left. So today, I made a promise to myself that if I ever get blessed again to be teamed up with that type of bunch, I will never ever leave. Awts.

I know Ryan is sad because I'm not there to be with him everyday. But I feel worse knowing that we could have been much happier had I not left. Pls pls pls. I wanna go back. I know it's not that simple and it just doesn't work that way. Aww.

This morning, Olan, Allan, Julie, and Jaypee called me just as they got out of the office. It made me miss them more. I didn't get the chance to be with people like them from my previous job. People that I am comfortable with. I regret the day I got so hurt and decided to submit my resignation letter.

I guess writing all my emotions down makes my heart feel a little lighter. I know that I should be more careful with making decisions in my life because they could totally turn everything upside down. I know I should have thought about it for a long time. All the should have's... Argh!

I am listening to Neyo's Together over and over again because the first stanza and chorus really means a lot about Ryan and I's relationship. Except the 2nd part of the song which involves cheating and being a player once. Hahaha. We weren't anything like that. I miss him now. Aww. I miss him all the time.

I had a dream yesterday. Something from the past. Plus swimming pools. Haha. This morning, I dreamed of a house party, drinking and all until it got crazy, involving murders and other horrifying stuff. What does that mean? I don't know. It only means one thing, I've been sleeping a lot.

Til here. I'll see ya next time. ;) Oh, plus Daddy left today.